VALENTINE'S IS A DAY FOR BEER

Well here we are in February again. Home to the beer guzzler’s biggest nemesis: Valentine’s Day. We beer lovers have done a pretty decent job of turning every other holiday to our advantage. I grant that St. Pat’s was an easy target, but just look what holiday beers and winter warmers have done to Christmas. 4th of July is one of the biggest beer days of the year. Memorial Day and Labor Day…done and done. But this Valentine’s Day is a real road block. I had to spend an hour in the beer aisle just to get a few ideas of where to start chipping away at this one.

It is not too hard to see where the problem lies. The very premise of Valentine’s Day is simple. Make guys do what women wish they would do all year or the men will spend the whole year getting bashed. I knew a thoughtful young man who bought his wife a beautiful new dishwasher. You would have thought this guy spit on her in public.
Given that, you can understand what a challenge squeezing a few delicious beers into this thinly disguised “Girl Day” is going to be, but don’t worry. I am here to save the day. In a few simple steps, you will be sharing brews with your sweetie and having the perfect romantic evening.

Beer #1: Boulder Brewing Company’s Mojo India Pale Ale
Almost every woman thought the first Austin Powers movie was funny. This is every guy’s chance to act like an idiot for a minute or two while quickly drinking this lovingly brewed IPA. Just make sure to drink this one yourself. It’s awfully heavy on the hops and if you give her that bitter beer face right off the bat--GAME OVER!

Beer #2: Coors’ Blue Moon
By now she is laughing at the little Mojo stunt and with any luck she is getting thirsty. “Do you have any Champagne?” she might ask. “Nope,” you’ll reply. “I have something even better.” Quickly pour two Blue Moons into wine glasses and BING! The smooth, fruity flavor and light color have both of you talking about how great she is.
NOTE: Be sure to have an escape hatch in the fridge. If the Blue Moon didn’t do it, be sure to have a fruit-flavored Michelob or something as a backup.

Beer #3: New Belgium Brewing’s Abbey Belgian Style Ale
I can only hope by now she is getting that sparkle in her eye, calling off dinner reservations and asking if you have any other treats in the beer frig. As luck would have it, you have Abbey Belgian Style Ale in the frig. How could anyone resist the rich mahogany color and fruity smoothness. (I’m not really tasting much fruit, but that’s what the label says.) It is smooth, though, and girls dig smooth. The wonder of this final choice is that the company is run by a woman, Kim Jordan, who’s husband was a home brewer and now they are rolling in cash. I had the pleasure of meeting her once, but she refused the cloning request.

If all this has gone your way, you are truly blessed and together we have beaten V-Day into submission. If this didn’t work, be sure to get in touch and I will see if the fellas at the brewery will help with a “Cupid’s Peach Wheat” for Valentine’s ’09.

IMPORTANT: Be sure you haven’t accidentally sabotaged yourself. Remove all
St. Pauli Girl and cheap canned beer from the frig prior to opening. I know cleavage on beer bottles and Pabst are fun, but you must stay focused.