Pabst Welcomes Hunters

It seems like many years ago when I first noticed beers signs in windows and in bars that welcomed and encouraged hunting. In my college days in Kirksville MO such signs were the norm. A huge orange sign with a deer head that welcomed the hunters into the bar or politely requested they procure a case was in every window.
I will grant that we always thought this was an iffy marriage. Lethal force, and a chemical that causes you to use it unwisely. We laughed at the joke, but never thought much of it. We were in the Midwest, get used to it.
A decade later I am an avid hunter and a beer guzzler. What used to seem ridicules now makes some sense. While there is no doubt the beer companies try to tie things together for profit, there really is a common note.
For most hunters that aren't hunting because they are hungry, hunting is leisure, recreation and social. There is nothing better suited to a social setting than beer. No one is encouraging a drunken hunt, but don't show up at the lodge without the proper refreshment. There is a lot of time between dusk and dawn. There is no way you need that much sleep.
My advice to all is bring plenty of beer to enjoy after the hunt. Nothing helps you celebrate or drown your sorrows like sweet beer.

Winter Warms the Soul

The end of the year and the beginning of winter brings all sorts of traditions and fun. Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s are times of year that people remember for the rest of their lives. It always seems like this time of year creates memories that are even more vivid than other seasons. I can remember sounds and smells of these times like no other.
It is no wonder then that brewers take advantage of these sensory images to create some of the best beers of the years.
There are certain great seasonals all year long, but winter always brings out the most flavorful. It is very hard for a brewer to pack much flavor into a beer you will have to drink fast in order to avoid dehydration as in a Summer seasonal. Fall beers are a bit stronger, but brewers still have to keep in mind that many people are going to be at a festival drinking many beers at a sitting. If you brew a 9% beer this time of year there will be a good deal of cleanup.
That leaves winter as the brewer’s great white canvas. I remeber many years ago brewing a small batch of dark India Pale Ale. It was my first brew and it just seemed right in winter.
This is definitely the time of year to pick your favorite brewer and see what they have to offer. This is going to be the beer that should define them.
Sam Adams is one of the best examples of this. You can drink every one of the millions of Sam Adams flavors on the shelf, but you will never find one that beats Fezziwig Ale. It is hard not to be happy just looking at the bottle. Little Dickens characters dancing around on the front of the bottle. How could this possibly be bad. This beer blends all kinds of different flavors, but in the end they mix to make a warm feeling all their own.
This one tops my list, but there are many others. Here in Weston we brew our Festival Ale for the fall and winter holidays. A bit darker than an Octoberfest, this beer has a malty base that lasts into the cold nights.
Many brewers rely heavily on malt and alcohol to make their winter beers special. This is a great feature if you are relaxing at home in front of the fire, but can cause some problems if you have enjoyed very many of these treats at your favorite pub. This is not an overall problem as there are plenty of these beauties that are in the normal content range, but it certainly something to keep an eye on.
If you are not next door to Sierra Nevada, Sam Adams or any of the other producers of distributed winter beers, this is a great time to check out the local brewpub. Almost every small brewer is going to be trying their hand at something that is likely to be wonderful to sip with some food. Depending on the day, a stop by the Weston Brewing Company will lend you a chance to try one of Justin’s "Reserve" batches that are certain to warm the soul. These and many other reserve beers, are made with the first run off the mash of a standard beer. The result is a much richer flavor. These styles of beer are also a great way to enjoy the holidays.

The Low Cal Craze

There have been a bundle of fads in beer. We all remember such enduring sensations as "dry", "red" & "draft". Usually, one version of these fads endures and the rest fade away. The problem with fads is that it is hard to tell what to think of them while they are happening. Light beer was a fad that stuck. The malternative beverage fad is certainly lingering longer than most of us had hoped. (At least Zima faded.) The hardest one to call in a long time is the "Ultra" fad. Many years ago several brewers tried to make "super lights". Olympia made Oly Gold that had about 1 calorie and even less flavor. If memory serves Coors also had such a product. It wasn't until Michelob Ultra that it really caught on as a fad. We even had to start carrying the stuff in our Irish Pub.
Before I start to sound bitter or negative I must say that I often drink the stuff. Sometimes when I really should be drinking water, I will pick one up as a delicious water alternative. Unlike other bottled water, I know this has been boiled. I got really excited when Ultra Amber hit the shelves. The distributor brought me a couple samples and I was sold. Light and tasty. "I am probably using more calories opening this than it contains," I thought. Guess again. The damn thing has 114 calories. I don't know what the Ultra part stands for. Many beers have under 100 calories and many others are close to it. Even many stouts aren't much more.
I'm sure any true beer guzzler doesn't drink many beers based on the calorie count. A beer guzzler's diet should really be based on an overall number of calories per day. Simply subtract the number of calories you want to stick to per day and subtract the beer calories. That gives you the amount of calories left for food. If you intend to drink all your calories, just make sure you throw in a couple oatmeal stouts for nutrition.
I suppose there is no real revelation here. If you want to look like me or David Beckham you will have to join your Ultra Amber on the exercise bike plain and simple.

The Season of Cider

It's hard to tell who should be writing about cider. There are certainly more publications and articles about wine, and far more writers. I have to admit to not reading all that much wine literature, but I do scan the magazines enough to know that hard cider is very rarely a focus. I have read a cider article or two in the beer mags, but they seem afraid to do much more than a quick story.
The biggest reason for all this is surely the lack of cider quality and diversity. There are a few good commercial examples of cider, but they don't seem to be terribly popular. It is hard to say why. I would guess a new drinker takes down a few Woodchucks and wonders why they would ever drink another cider. Given the fact that most hard ciders have the flavor and sugar content of a green Jolly Ranchers, this is easy to understand.
Look for a cider with nothing but apples and yeast and I think you will have a different opinion. We were recently asked by a local cider maker to ferment some delicious juice. It was the first time I had cider with nothing but apples and I am sold. You can drink them all night. No stomach ache or diabetic shock. Just great apples.
Make it your goal as a guzzler this fall to find some great ciders. They are out there and they are worth the hunt.

RETRO?

I recently read a wonderful article in "All About Beer" magazine. It talked about the "Retro" beer movement. The article made the point that many younger people like to drink old canned brands in order to make a statement for or against something. They drink the beer to have something in common with a dad or grandpa and to give a big middle finger to snobs.
I am here to tell you there is no such thing as a retro beer movement.
There is a beer cycle that has been going on since I can remember, and I would have to guess it happened long before that.
I graduated from high school in 1992. My first can of beer was Pabst Blue Ribbon. It was the only brand of beer my cool friends would drink and it was a couple years before 1992. (Sorry Mom)
They drank only Pabst because it was better than Bud Light dammit and coincidentally less expense. Almost 20 years later the exact same thing is still happening. 20 years may be a flash if you are a mountain or rock, but it is a bit too long to be considered anything other than permanent in pop culture.
There is absolutely nothing for Freud to figure out here. I drank Pabst and many other "Retro" beers then and now because I don't like to drink the same thing everyone else drinks. I want people to come up to me and say, "Aw Jesus, you drink that!" So I can smile and say, "You're damn right."
I drink it so I can pour some in a Bud Light drinkers glass and laugh when they don't notice the difference.
During the last 20 years I have also learned a lot about the history of all the old brands and decided to make my living as a brewer and connoisseur, but that doesn't mean the 16 year-old rebel doesn't still get thirsty from time to time. When that happens I need a can of something obscure. Or, I guess, retro.

Sipping Beer

As a true beer guzzler I find something to appreciate in most every beer. You will find everything from NA to monsters in my frig. There really is a time and place for almost any beer. That said, I still have my favorites. I have always found the most to appreciate in a delicately balanced beer that can be consumed in fairly large quantities without instant liver damage. I have had a great time tasting some of the crazy brews. I even went so far as to make a pilgrimage to The Stone Brewery in San Diego where alcohol contents below 9% are rare. I just could never figure out where they fit in to social events. Am I supposed to bring them to a party after work and be known as the drunk guy who couldn’t drink two beers. I don’t know a bartender in their right mind who would want a bunch of customers slugging back 10% beers all night, much less the janitor. I had to appreciate them from a distance.
That all changed when the nice fellows at Boulevard in Kansas City invited me down to visit the brewery. Mike Utz showed me around his new, amazing facility and kindly ushered me into the tasting area at the end of our talk. I was greeted by the head brewer and several other brewery workers who guided me through several new beers they were brewing for what became their “Smokestack Series.” In the tasting area all the beers were on tap. I tried several and began to get a very warm comfortable sensation that told me I wouldn’t be driving for awhile. I enjoyed all the beers, but had the same old feeling of “What would I do with these?”
A couple months later I was invited to join the fellows again for the release party for the new series. Once I saw how it was packaged and displayed I finally got it.
These aren’t “extreme” beers, they are sipping beers. I had been thinking of this thing wrong the whole time. I had pictured some 30 year-old guy who had fried brain cells and taste buds to the point he had to drink 10% beer with two pounds of hops per pint just to get started. Boulevard and several others taught me that these beers are on purpose. It is not just a brewer who got sick of having poorly stored beer go bad and decided to pickle it with alcohol and hops, it is balance and art.
This new wave of products has even encouraged me to change my guzzling. I can sit with the fellows after a hard day at the brewery and patiently drink one of these in twice the time as a session beer because there is so much to enjoy. As a matter of fact, they even changed the way we brew. Every commercial batch we make now loses its first 15 gallons to our “reserve” batch that gets heavily hopped and is naturally higher in gravity.
In case you are still a bit afraid to take this to your next party, there is an easy solution. Just bring one 750ml bottle and offer it to several friends. You can talk about what a trendsetter you are and with an empty glass that used to contain 10% alcohol your friends will agree. After that, get back to the tried and true and you will be a hero. There is a wonderful world of new flavors out there, we just need to learn how to use them.

Lemons are for kids

Wheat beer has surely become one of the signs of Summer. Not that they aren't available all year long, but they sure do sound a lot better in summer.
Thanks to the German and Belgian traditions these wheat beers are often fruity. American wheat makers too scared to use the yeast to create these flavors encourage drinkers to add their own fruit to the mix. Lemons are the most common choice, but oranges have also begun to invade beer.
Allow me to start by saying that citrus in beer can be delicious. And... Just like mushed up beets are a favorite or new eaters, I'm sure lemons, limes and oranges do just fine for the neophyte drinker. But once you are ready to graduate to the big boy pants of drinking may I suggest jalapenos.
Keep in mind that several jalapeno laden beers are probably clouding my judgement right now, but this stuff rocks. I have had several "pepper" beers before. One local brewpub even made a good one, but most taste like pickles or worse.
My contribution to the world of beer is much better, much easier, and goes something like this:

1. Ask a good friend who has a garden to grow you some fresh jalapenos.
2. Offer sound knowledge for some of the peppers.
3. Cut the pepper in half, then into slices.
4. Pour yourself a very light wheat ale. The less carbonation the better.
5. Place jalapenos into beer and stir.
6. Drink beer.

This little recipe is sure to please. It will also burn your lips.

Next time you are at a bar ask them why there are no jalapenos in their condiment tray. If there are some, let me know the name of the bar and I will meet you there.

FESTIVAL SEASON ARRIVES

As any good beer lover knows there is no bad time for a beer, but there is no better time than a festival.
There are hundreds of different festivals in the United States and with very few exceptions they are the perfect places to enjoy a tasty beer. The tricky part of these grand celebrations is making the right choices. The most wonderful festival can be destroyed by choosing the wrong flavors to enjoy. I’m not here to order for you, just to help dodge the landmines and hit the easy home runs.
Some festivals make your choice of beer very easy. If you are at an actual beer festival get your little sample cup and get to it. The only thing to keep in mind at this type of event is a safe way home and food in between every couple dozen samples. Be sure to try things you are curious about first as your pallet will be a bit more discerning early on. As time goes by try a bunch of beers you would have never tried otherwise. You are bound to like about anything at this point and will become a sudden fan of beers you would have never tried otherwise.
The second easiest festivals are the seasonal variety. If you are at a Summerfest you are probably only choosing between light lagers and wheats anyway. Occasionally there will be a special seasonal one better than another but the key is to wet the whistle. 100 degree heat is not the right time to experiment. Stick with a domestic you know or some other favorite. Fall festivals are traditionally the best for beer. Many brewers make special beers just for the season and they are often their very best. I believe the word Oktoberfest is actually German for heaven. Feel free to find a beer that you like and that is easy to drink if you need to, but don’t resort to mass production at one of these wonderful events. Fall festivals are for the pros. Bud lights and frat boys are asked to disguise themselves for these sacred events. If you find yourself stuck outside at some winter event I’m not sure what to tell you. Find your way indoors next to a fire with a winter warmer selection nearby.
Then there are the ethnic festivals. As luck would have it, most of these festivals revolve around cultures where beer is fairly important. Irish and German festivals seem to be the most common for some strange reason. You would think these events would be easier than they are for selecting the right beer, but commercialism has made these a bit tricky. What do you do when Coors Light is the featured beer at the local Irish Fest? If there is no other choice I suppose you drink it or go home. Even if a major brewer is the sponsor of an ethnic festival there is usually some tent with something more authentic. What is the point of going to a cultural event just to experience American mainstream culture?The good news is there are very few festivals where the growing army of craft brewers haven’t at least put a toe in the door. Even State and County Fairs often have a few choices present. The key is to have fun. By simply looking at the list of sponsors for the event you should have a good idea of what you are getting into. Just remember you can always protest bad selection with a killer tailgate party.

VALENTINE'S IS A DAY FOR BEER

Well here we are in February again. Home to the beer guzzler’s biggest nemesis: Valentine’s Day. We beer lovers have done a pretty decent job of turning every other holiday to our advantage. I grant that St. Pat’s was an easy target, but just look what holiday beers and winter warmers have done to Christmas. 4th of July is one of the biggest beer days of the year. Memorial Day and Labor Day…done and done. But this Valentine’s Day is a real road block. I had to spend an hour in the beer aisle just to get a few ideas of where to start chipping away at this one.

It is not too hard to see where the problem lies. The very premise of Valentine’s Day is simple. Make guys do what women wish they would do all year or the men will spend the whole year getting bashed. I knew a thoughtful young man who bought his wife a beautiful new dishwasher. You would have thought this guy spit on her in public.
Given that, you can understand what a challenge squeezing a few delicious beers into this thinly disguised “Girl Day” is going to be, but don’t worry. I am here to save the day. In a few simple steps, you will be sharing brews with your sweetie and having the perfect romantic evening.

Beer #1: Boulder Brewing Company’s Mojo India Pale Ale
Almost every woman thought the first Austin Powers movie was funny. This is every guy’s chance to act like an idiot for a minute or two while quickly drinking this lovingly brewed IPA. Just make sure to drink this one yourself. It’s awfully heavy on the hops and if you give her that bitter beer face right off the bat--GAME OVER!

Beer #2: Coors’ Blue Moon
By now she is laughing at the little Mojo stunt and with any luck she is getting thirsty. “Do you have any Champagne?” she might ask. “Nope,” you’ll reply. “I have something even better.” Quickly pour two Blue Moons into wine glasses and BING! The smooth, fruity flavor and light color have both of you talking about how great she is.
NOTE: Be sure to have an escape hatch in the fridge. If the Blue Moon didn’t do it, be sure to have a fruit-flavored Michelob or something as a backup.

Beer #3: New Belgium Brewing’s Abbey Belgian Style Ale
I can only hope by now she is getting that sparkle in her eye, calling off dinner reservations and asking if you have any other treats in the beer frig. As luck would have it, you have Abbey Belgian Style Ale in the frig. How could anyone resist the rich mahogany color and fruity smoothness. (I’m not really tasting much fruit, but that’s what the label says.) It is smooth, though, and girls dig smooth. The wonder of this final choice is that the company is run by a woman, Kim Jordan, who’s husband was a home brewer and now they are rolling in cash. I had the pleasure of meeting her once, but she refused the cloning request.

If all this has gone your way, you are truly blessed and together we have beaten V-Day into submission. If this didn’t work, be sure to get in touch and I will see if the fellas at the brewery will help with a “Cupid’s Peach Wheat” for Valentine’s ’09.

IMPORTANT: Be sure you haven’t accidentally sabotaged yourself. Remove all
St. Pauli Girl and cheap canned beer from the frig prior to opening. I know cleavage on beer bottles and Pabst are fun, but you must stay focused.

GUZZLING AND REFLECTING A TONE

It seems like everything in America is an either or proposition. I’m sure this is true everywhere in the world. Up to this point it just seemed like a fact of life - until it crept into beer.
Either you like extreme beer or you like bland beer. Cans are the devil or the best thing ever invented by man. The list of beer arguments seems to be growing. Luckily, because of the subject of the argument these battles never seem to last very long or even be remembered.
Another either or trend has started up in beer publications as well. Either you are evaluating and putting numbers on beers or hopelessly describing the fine floral aspects of everything ever bottled.
To this humble guzzler, beer is man’s greatest gift and the fact that talking and writing about it have become boring is a sin.
To this end I will blab endlessly about everything having to do with life and beer, but with a few simple guidelines:
The only numbers to be associated with beer should involve measurements made by a brewer, ie. Gravity, temperature, color or carbonation.
Beers are not good or bad. Unless there is poison in one there is nothing inherently bad about a beer it just needs to be used in the right situation. Possibly in the glass of someone you don’t like, but all beer has a purpose.
There is no place the topic of beer should be off limits. If they can drink wine in church beer should be everywhere.
Out of these three rules, I probably feel the most strongly about #2. I think that beer is art. This is probably a bit easier to appreciate in some small craft brews than in mass market beers, but just because they are reproduced more doesn’t lessen their value. Starry night doesn’t get worse because Wal-Mart sells 5 billion copies. Any beer historian knows that making thick, chunky beers in the 1800’s was easy. The heroes were those with the skill to make it delicate and balanced.
Never has this become more obvious than with today’s craft beer brewers. “Big” beers will last in a bottle for years while delicious lighter offerings can turn to crap in a week.
This is probably starting to sound like I am some ninny who can’t gag down anything stronger than a Zima. Au contraire, I am thrilled each time Sam Adams and Dogfish Head try to one-up each other in the battle of alcohol. I have eaten hops right out of the tank. (Not recommended). But there is a time and place where every different beer should be properly guzzled. I can’t ever remember being in the bleachers at a ballgame in 100F heat and wished for a triple bock. I wouldn’t order a can of Stag on a first date. But don’t think for one minute I don’t stumble into the woods with a deer tag and a 30-pack of Pabst. Or that I don’t toast a sparkling Sierra Nevada at an upscale restaurant.To be a respectable beer guzzler in my opinion you must be a total contradiction and enjoy every sip!!